Getting over my aversion to online dating

I don't like online dating. I hate the idea of looking at strangers as potential partners. I much prefer just living  my life, meeting people, and occasionally falling in love. The problem is that that does happen, but that very rarely anything good comes out of it. In the best case nothing happens; in the worst case, I end up with my heart in tiny pieces. 

Is a relationship the main thing in life? No, it isn't. The important thing is to be a whole person on your own. But once you are that, why not share that existence with someone else? A combination of having to learn how not to give in to pushy people a bit late in life, and having had an itinerant lifestyle for years due to my life in academia with its short contracts, made me a bit of a loner in recent years. After a relationship I should not have been in, I decided that the important skill to learn was not to be in relationships I should not be in. And then you don't practice being in relationships you should be in! And if you keep moving to countries where you literally know nobody and therefore have to start a new existence without friends, you put your energy into being self-sufficient. But then one day you look around you and your realise that yes, you are the best support system to yourself that you could be, but that someone to regularly wake up next to would be nice too.

Not too long ago I was getting disheartened. And I had several people I love and admire point out to me that I am 46 years old now, and that if I had any talent in ending up in a loving relationship without involving the internet, I would have done so by now. And that I had nothing to lose by giving the internet a go. And who knows what I might have to gain.

I initially had a look at Fitness Singles, as I like my sport, but I figured you can't tell whether you are compatible with someone from just knowing what sports they engage in. So I swapped to a more general site. And I made my profile. I hesitated a bit. What to say there? I made sure to emphasise my quirks. If someone can't cope with one of those clichés who tries to buy vegetables without packaging, doesn't cook with meat, who has been showering cold for some 1 1/2 years and who doesn't have a TV, then I should not waste time on them and they should not waste time on me.

So how's it going? Not bad. There are some people on there that look interesting, and I have already met two of them. That didn't really go anywhere, but no unpleasant experiences either. And it would be naïve to assume you meet some metaphorical mr Right there straight away. But the first steps have been taken. Who knows what will follow!